Influenza, the whiny complaining post

So. I think I have swine flu. I mean, it might not be, but with all the hype in the media it might as well be. Whatever this is, it really, really, really sucks. I’m sore EVERYWHERE to the point where I can’t sleep well. All I did yesterday was sleep–and I mean, that’s all I did. I had a hard time walking from the living room to the kitchen without getting dizzy. I wanted to shower desperately, but I was too woozy to stand for more than a few minutes. Today I feel better, my head doesn’t hurt as much and I don’t feel the need to sleep, but my tonsils are EXTREMELY swollen. If not for that last part, I’d be feeling like a million bucks today. ….Other than still being a little dizzy when I walk around or stand for too long.

What makes this worse is the fact that I’m in the middle of all of the fires, and I get super sensitive to smoke. Last fall I went to Disneyland while a fire was going on in Anahiem and I ended up getting extremely sick but without a fever. I was sick for about a month while my system worked out the smoke crap. I’d say that what I’ve got now is from the smoke except for the fact that I’ve had a relatively high fever the entire time, and with the smoke sickness I didn’t have a fever. (Yesterday the thermometer said it was in the 102° area, but today thus far it’s read that I’m in the 97° area. Go figure.)

Whatever I’ve got, try not to get it. This illness is hell. It’s the worst flu I’ve ever had. I can’t sleep and that’s all I want to do. I’m totally starving but the act of eating makes me feel sick. I would kill for pizza or tacos right now, but I can’t have any because of the act of eating thing….And because of that, I have legitimately thought of making a food smoothie, which makes me feel uncomfortable with myself because that’s just naasty.

On the other hand, this staying home and not at school is rather nice. I won’t say that come this weekend when I’m feeling better and have to catch up on work in  my two lab classes (computers and clothing construction) and notes in my child development class, but til then, I like this. Kinda. I’ve been reading a lot of mylifeisaverage.com, which makes me feel a lot less alone in the world in terms of interacting with strangers in odd ways, love of Harry Potter and other so-called childish things, desires to build forts, and realizing the person you’re with might be your soul mate based on the strange things they do. (Michael sometimes won’t let me cross the threshold to the kitchen in his house unless he carries me though the doorway. It’s adorable, strange, and I love him for it.)

Yesterday, between feeling like hell and sleeping (which was about an hour collectively) I decided to search for food of my childhood. I couldn’t find the Disney ice cream I loved so much–it was Hercules themed, I remember, and it came with candies you topped the ice cream with, and if anyone knows of an article about it to prove I’m not crazy it would be much appreciated. However, I DID find evidence that the Super Mario Bros soda that I drank as a kid actually existed. It was in this article which was how I found out that they don’t make Slice anymore, and that Vault is just a renamed, different colored version of Surge.  Also, clear Pepsi? Of course that wouldn’t work. People associate color with taste.

At this point, I see that I am just rambling about nothing. I have no point with this post other than to complain. I am done, for now.

Life Happens….sometimes.

Ah, the infrequent insanity known as my life. Last week my computer cord finally died and my mom ordered me a new one. (It’s so fun to be an unemployed college student.) I went to the boyfriend’s house for about a week, obviously sans laptop, and I didn’t come home til two nights ago.

The last 48 hours have been insane. I have totally forgotten what going to school feels like, and now I have to adjust to only going two days a week as opposed to my four last semester. Yesterday was potentially the longest day I’ve experienced in a while, though I admit that might be due to my usual habit of staying up until three or four in the morning and sleeping until after noon, and getting up before nine is really strange for me. It doesn’t help that my classes are from 8:00AM to 10:00PM, which might account for the length of the day in general. Luckily for me, as I’ve stated, I only have classes two days a week, so Tuesdays are great since I have the whole day do to nothing. Or, y’know, work on class stuff.

I have a habit of getting caught up in long term planning and, at least lately, I’ll have everything planned or picked out beforehand. This has always happened–and usually will end up in lists of some kind. (Like in the case of the Alice Halloween party. It’s all planned out, but all lists right now.) Right now, for my planning excitement, is a friend’s wedding, which is coming up in about three months. I’ve been looking at dresses and trying to figure out a tentative outfit, which I already sort of have laid out if plans don’t change from now. My mom bought a red halter knee-length dress a few years ago, but she never wore it–it still had the tags on it, so she just handed it to me. I tried it on and saw instantly what else I’d need to wear with it: a sweet black cardigan, black heels, and, potentially, a flat, veiled black cocktail hat (with feathers if I can manage.) With appropriate hair and makeup, I could have an outfit suitable for not only the wedding, but any jazz fest I happen upon and going to the Cicada Club whenever my brother performs there.
I’m rambling. (Though I guess that’s the point of this.) Anyway, I know I have to wait for the invitation to actually arrive–I’ve been informed of the date but no other details–before I can actually choose what I’m wearing as I need to see what sort of dress is specified.
Actually, I’m incredibly excited about this whole business. This will be the first wedding I’ve gone to that wasn’t for a family member or a family friend I was too young to care about–this is my man Bradley we’re talking about. Brad and I were seriously, seriously close at one time, talking every day and sometimes having incredibly long conversations about nothing late at night. I love him like family, truly. What’s funny about our friendship, though, is there is almost a twenty year age gap between us, but that has never bothered me (or my family, surprisingly, seeing as I met then-36-year-old Brad when I was 17.)
Anyway, regardless of that oddity, I’m super-duper excited for this, if only for my own selfish reasons  [which is WEDDING OH MY GOD I GET TO DRESS UP FANCY AND MAKE MICHAEL DRESS UP FANCY AND HAVE FUN WITH PEOPLE I KNOW AND LOVE WHILE THEY’RE DRESSED UP FANCY AND DRUNK] and I think it will be worth a long semester for.

Speaking of school again, I have to be up in four hours. Goodbye until tomorrow, all!

A Ghostly Birthday Wish

I just wanted to wish a semi-belated/quasi-early happy anniversary to my favorite Disneyland attraction, The Haunted Mansion. It opened (unofficially) on August 9, 1969, and the official opening date was August 12, 1969–and this year is a magical 40th anniversary celebration!

Food and more food (and a bit of fab fabric)

So this week would have been more eventful on McFly.Vintage if not for two things:
1) I went to Disneyland last Monday. That morning, before leaving, I registered for my fall classes and in the whirlwind rush to get ready to leave for the Happiest Place on Earth, I forgot that I had left a cup of water sitting on my vanity, above my mini table where my laptop lives. (Sidenote: I have a desk, but my sewing machine invaded while my computer was distracted by constantly being used.) My cat got locked in my room and knocked over my cup…all over my computer and a few notebooks that I had left on my mini table. It didn’t work for a few days, but it was just a matter of letting it dry out.
2) Less involved reason, but I went to Michael’s (boyfriend) for the week and didn’t want to carry a potentially broken computer with me the whole time. Due to budget constraints on our part which consisted of not leaving the house unless we were doing something free or someone else was paying, this ended up being a bad decision on my part.

Anyway, I’m back now, with potentially the most random post EVAH. Lots of cooking stuff, so for those of you looking for one-person meal deliciousness or something different, I do believe you’re in the right place!
This week, I’ve been eating a lot of eggs. Dunno why, though I think it was because Shari (Michael’s mom, who is amazingly cool) bought some last time we went to the store. Twice this week I made the same small meal, which is like an omelet but not as complicated. It’s more of a scramble, like you get at Denny’s, but you have more control over the quality. (I can’t make a truly good omelet to save my life, actually, so I sort of adapted to making this in its place.) Oh boy, are you ready to find out how I did it?!
(Just a bit of FYI: Based on the fact that I don’t really measure anything unless I’m following a recipe or baking, I don’t see the point of telling you a list of things to gather to use to replicate exactly what I made for myself. I’ll bold what the ingredients are for each, however, and if you’re keeping score at home you can write it down. Otherwise, email me and I’ll try to construct a basic measured variation if you’re that concerned about your own cooking being exact :D.)

Okay, so first thing I did was I tore up a few slices of deli turkey. I tore it more because I didn’t want to dirty a knife, but it ended up having a really cool texture that I liked. Then I mixed up two eggs and approximately two tablespoons of water for a scrambled egg base. I sprayed a pan down with some Pam and poured the eggs in, then after a moment of letting the base cook up a bit, I scattered in the turkey. Because it’s my absolute favorite flavor in the world, I added a generous pinch of ground chipotle pepper for some general spice. I scrambled the eggs as usual, keeping it over a medium heat, and tossing the eggs and stirring constantly til it was done to my liking, then I topped it all with cheese once it was on a plate. Paired with toast with jam and orange juice, it made a nice late breakfast (and a few days later, a nice midnight meal.)
About the chipotle for a second. I like it a lot, it adds like a smoky barbecue sauce flavor to whatever I add it to, and then you don’t need much else but perhaps a sprinkling of salt, depending on the dish. I do that with canned tuna a lot–enough mayo to make everything clump together, a bit of chipotle, a dash of salt. Tasty. If you don’t have any, try and find it with the ground spices in the spice aisle, and use it wherever you can manage it!

The second meal I made–though this was by far not my delightfully original take–was a simple pork and beans dish. (Ironically, and not planned, I am listening to the Weezer song of the same name as I type this.) It was the second night in a row that we had it, but it was more because of a surplus of hunger and a lack of desire for doing anything difficult that prompted the second-night meal. While my Michael washed some dishes, I sliced and pan-fried some turkey hotdogs and heated some baked beans on the stovetop. When the dogs were done, I let ’em stew with the beans for a few while we finished dishes. Delicious and easy, two of my favorite things. Oh yeah, and unhealthy, but at least the hot dogs were actually white meat! I think we watched TRON while we ate our deliciously unhealthy (but protein-filled) meal. So Michael and I are not only geeks, but lazy geeks.

The last of my cooking delights while I was at Michael’s was last night and possibly the most delicious out of all of them. While at the store this past week (though really, every time we’re at the store) we purchase the Birdseye Steamfresh veggie bags. I usually go for mixed or something with broccoli or water chestnuts (or both) while he goes for peas and corn. And ONLY peas and corn. He can eat an entire bag of peas in one sitting.
Last night, in hunger desperation, we decided to make our bags of Steamfresh deliciousness as meals. I’m not complaining, he ate something green that wasn’t a salad. (Sidenote: He’s been eating very well lately, and I’m the one who hasn’t, so I can’t really say that, haha.) I had gotten a bag of rice, peas, and carrots, and I made fried rice out of it.
First thing I did was I steamed the bag of long grain white rice and mixed vegetables (that’s exactly what it says on the bag if you want to look for it.) This took about four minutes, so I took the time to prep my pan with some sesame oil over a low heat. Once the rice was done, I let it sit for a few while I pan-scrambled an egg and chopped it finely with the spatula. I dislike this method of scrambling eggs generally as it makes them somewhat burnt and flavorless, but it works well for fried rice. I then poured in the rice and veggies and mixed them with the scrambled and chopped-up egg and let them sit for a few, stirring every so often.
Now, what most people don’t realize about fried rice is that it’s usually made from leftover steamed rice–even in restaurants, that’s how they do it. If the rice gets too crunchy or old to serve as fresh steamed rice, they pop it in the refrigerator overnight and, when pan-fried with veggies and all, it gets a new lease on deliciousness the next day. Fried rice, when made at home, will taste best if made with day old rice–the previous night’s takeout leftovers are a safe bet, especially if you have leftover veggies, too, and if everything has been well chilled. Another thing that most people don’t realize is the fact that most everyone adds a bit of soy sauce to the rice and veggies for flavor and color. That, my friends, is what I did next–I added a leftover packet of soy sauce to my rice. I stirred to coat it all, and then plopped it into a pan. A non-traditional addition I made was a bit of sea salt and coarse pepper, and a touch more soy sauce to suit my taste. It was DELICIOUS.

Tonight two different types of yummies were made. My mom fried up some

The chips. Soooo good. The quality on the photo is bad since it was on my phone. Sorry!

The chips. Soooo good. The quality on the photo is bad since it was on my phone. Sorry!

tortillas for the carnitas we had for dinner, and she used the leftover oil to fry up some homemade chips out of tortilla pieces. It was DELICIOUS. I didn’t even want salsa, just some salt and I was fine!
The other delicious thing I made today was a home-done vanilla frappuchino. I looked up the recipe, and it’s really not too difficult. Make about a half cup espresso, blend it with a cup and a half of ice, a cup or so of milk, a teaspoon of sugar or sweetener, and a generous shot of flavored syrup. We have vanilla in the house, so I used that–and wowza! It was the same consistency as the chain-bought variety, and even more delicious. I was impressed. I drank it before I even finished the first paragraph of this post!

The blended coffee! It was yummers. (camera, bad, sorry, etc)

The blended coffee! It was yummers. (camera, bad, sorry, etc)

My friends, siblings, mother, and I have been in loose discussions for hard-set plans–a Halloween party this year, since the holiday falls on a Saturday. Though themes for Halloween parties are usually not a good idea, we’re doing a “Storybook” theme and all of us (sans my mom and Michael) are coming as Alice in Wonderland characters to host a mad  tea party for all of our “storybook” character guests. (The invitation will specify fictional characters that are child-friendly as we will have a lot of kids coming.)
I’m going to be the March Hare, and my original plan was to buy all the pieces and make the ornate coat I want to wear. However, I’ve been told that due to monetary constraints, I must do the opposite–make or reuse or purchase all of the other items of my costume, and buy the coat, since it’ll cost less. I’ve decided to buy a pirate coat, so it’s something I can re-wear when Renaissance Faire comes, but I’m torn between a good quality but plain brown coat, and a not-as-good-quality lace-edged “bucaneer” dress that I’d alter to be a more ornate coat-like piece. The first could be reused at Faire for Michael’s use, and so could the second for me but with a bit more difficulty as my costume is that of a peasant. I dunno. I’m leaning towards the crappy one because it’d be really awesome-looking.
One thing that I am for sure going to make is a vest for myself. I originally was going to go to Joann Fabrics to look for something silky and fun, but then I

The fabric from the shorts. Again, bad quality from my phones camera.

The fabric from the shorts. It's going to be horribly tacky and I love it!!!

remembered that 1) I can’t afford it and 2) I already HAVE a fun patterned fabric to work with! Last week my setpdad gave me a pair of extra-baggy and long men’s shorts that he didn’t want. They are mostly white with purple white and gray plaid all over it. I deconstructed the shorts to find that they are made from a massive amount of material and would be more than enough to make a vest out of! Assuming I get the bad quality jacket (since it’d work better with this costume) this would look really horrible with it, haha. BUT it’ll give me the chance to practice patternmaking, since I’m sort of just doing this on my own and on the cheap. I really hope everything comes together!! Keep reading and I’ll keep posting updates on it–and a comment or two of encouragement wouldn’t hurt, either 😉

Just Desserts: Strawberries, Blueberries and Cream

My mom has been pushing strawberries and cream desserts this weekend, especially since she got back from a Cuban restaurant where she had that very dish and she found it to be incredible. I passed on it last night, but tonight I took her up on her offer.  I made it myself since I MUST have my food looking pretty.

The finished product. I didn't take photos of the construction.

The finished product. I didn't take photos of the construction.

The taking of the wafer cookie.  Yes, that's an Ikea fork.

The taking of the wafer cookie. Yes, that's an Ikea fork.

With the whipped cream mixed in.

With the whipped cream mixed in.

Halfway done!!

Halfway done!!

Done!! Yummy :)

Done!! Yummy 🙂

Now you might be wondering: Caitlin McFly, why does Mommy McFly suddenly need to have strawberries and cream as a dessert now all the time? Wasn’t the dessert at the restaurant special and magical and therefore should not be replicated at home?
Why, yes, reader, I agree with you. But as to why, I think it’s because of me. She started describing the cream that was used on the fruit–sweet, thick, sort of a caramel taste–and she realized that it was just a condensed milk sort of sauce. I brought up home replication, and, well, that was that.

The sauce. It sounds like a drug.

The sauce itself. And part of my retrotastic kitchen.

And what do they sell in the aisle with powdered milk and flour and baking goods? That’s right! A Spanish [note: “Spanish”  used as an umbrella term) dulce leche sauce in a bottle!

This was my first time trying the sauce, but every time I’ve walked by it in the supermarket I’ve wanted to pick it up and try it. I think there was sort of an intimidation factor to it, considering that it looks like pudding, and on the bottle it’s being poured over melon. Melon! Ew! So, I never got it. It took my mom’s desire to replicate a special, one-of-a-kind dessert on a rare childless night out for it to finally enter our home. She had high expectations for it, apparently, as there were two bottles in the fridge last I checked.

If you’re curious about trying it since I have, let me tell you what I thought. I liked it quite a lot, actually–texturally, it’s somewhere between a thick syrup and a runny pudding. It coated the fruit rather well, and it stuck to the wafer roll cookie that I had put in as garnish. The leche had a very caramel taste to it generally, and my oral reaction was reminiscent of eating a thick, rich cheesecake with a sort of pucker. I’m definitely going to try and find other uses for it….such as on cake. Mmmm. Leche cake.

Further Introductions [a bit less boring]

It’s too hot today. According to my Weather Channel desktop widget, it’s 106° here today. I hate living in a valley of brown that catches the sun and bounces it around my mostly-white, un-air-conditioned house.

Now, I’m not just posting to complain about the weather (and my lack of temperature-controlled rooms) but to actually get things rolling on what it is I do in my spare time–other than the obvious answer of wasting my life on the internet. I make jewelry and pins–I call it art, others call it “Ohh pretty make something for me!” which I never do, which is probably why I have mostly guy friends now.

I always wanted to be a Disney princess, and for Halloween of 2008 I decided to

Not too shabby!

Not too shabby for a first time! (I guess I was inhaling or something, I don't know.)

make my dream come true and make myself an impossible-to-find costume, which is a specific dress that Giselle wears as a cartoon in the movie Enchanted. I borrowed a sewing machine, bought a pattern close to what I wanted and $100 worth of fabric and supplies, and I got to work. It was not only my first time making clothes, but also my first time working with a sewing machine ever. The results could have been a lot better, but ultimately turned out beyond my expectations (which were that my finger was going to get caught in the sewing machine and the dress would tear while I was wearing it.)

My jewelry making started fall of 2008, when I wanted to make a pair of earrings out of bottlecaps. I went to my local craft store and bought a set of pliers, a storage box, some fishhook fittings, and some jump rings. After some fiddling around, they came out sort of crude, but definitely wearable and awesome. (Unfortunately, I have no idea where my original pair is, so I cannot photograph it.)

My favorite pin from my Beauty set.

My favorite pin from my 'Beauty' set.

It was around this same time that I got a book that would be ultimately my biggest inspiration for doing EVERYTHING myself, which is Mark Montano’s Big-Ass Book of Crafts. Bought originally because the name sounded hip, with-it, and hilarious, this book became my go-to for most of my Christmas gifts in 2008 and an inspiration for making unique pins, and three sets of them at that. I have pictures of only two of them unfortunately.

The first thing I made that wasn’t an intended gift came from fiddling with a

A somewhat blurry closeup of a pin from my Alice set.

A somewhat blurry closeup of a pin from my 'Alice' set.

vintage watch I inherited. It was in poor shape to begin with, so it wasn’t a huge issue to me when the band snapped off of one end. I simply took off the other end and thought, Hmm, this would make a really interesting steampunk pendant if I can get this thing taken apart. About an hour later I had the watch completely disassembled, and I took some loose gears and tossed them into the now-empty watch casing, closed up the back, and came to a dead hault in what I wanted to do with this watch. It wouldn’t work as a pendant because it was too heavy, and it couldn’t work as a pin because the hot glue wouldn’t adhere to the back, and that’s just unprofessional. It took another three weeks for me to hit gold on what to do

The Time Travelers Medal, for those who have gone 88MPH with a flux capacitor.

The Time Traveler's Medal, for those who have gone 88MPH with a flux capacitor.

with it, but I finally did. I found a piece of ribbon  left over from my Giselle costume, folded it over like it was a military badge, and glued it all together nicely with a pin back at the top of it all. To “fill” in the now empty bottom bar, I took some old brass bits from a pair of eastern-style earrings, another part of my costume-jeweled inheritance.

Everything sort of snowballed from there in terms of what I’d make. I made some more flower pins (some out of flowers from plastic party leis, which have a bad habit of falling apart.) I got some beads from various necklaces and bracelets and made some gorgeous pearl and crystal earrings. For a friend’s birthday, I made a Twilight-themed charm bracelet–MUCH cooler than any  Bella Swan knockoff available online, mostly because it’s completely a one-of-a-kind! I’ve made a lot more recently, but quite frankly, I think you should stop reading about how I’m creative (for today, come back later!!) and make something for yourself!

PS–a blog about my exciting life as a baker will probably be next. ❤ C. McFly

I caved. [an Extended Autobiography]

I got myself a blog, just like all of the other creative Generation Myspace kids out there in the intarwebz.
Well, I guess we should start with an introduction. I’m Caitlin.

Hi.

I was born and raised in Southern California, in Orange County mainly. I grew up basically in Disneyland, or pretty damned close to it–I spent most of my weekends as a kid inside the gates, and when I wasn’t there, I lived close enough so I could hear the fireworks every night.
I was sort of a troubled kid in terms of emotional issues, but I hear that’s common in kids who dealt with multiple homes and multiple families–as in, my parents were divorced. For the first seven years of my life, my mom and I lived with my grandparents, and I would visit my father every weekend. My mom got married when I was seven, and then she and I and my new stepdad moved to another part of the city I had grown up in. I then was spending time at my house during the week, and every other weekend was with my father then my grandparents, respectively. I was treated differently by each parental figure, so I didn’t really have stability in terms of discipline, nor was I around long enough in each place to really adjust to that treatment. In spite of that, I credit my grandparents with raising me and planting the seeds of who I would become later in life.
Within a year or so, the trips to my father’s became more infrequent, and finally I stopped seeing him altogether. My last memory of him is hanging out with him in my grandparents’ house after he had taken me to 7-11 for snacks and the junk food I associated with his house. He had gotten me trail mix, the kind with not only nuts and rasins but M&M’s in there also. I mentioned that I liked the M&M’s the best, and I was eating those the most…and he told me that if I ate too many, I would get fat. Just like that, I had an image problem. I was eight.
A few years later, my mom and her second husband filed for divorce. I was told that they just wanted to be friends, that they were better off that way, that my stepdad was going to stay in my life. The last time I saw him was my eleventh birthday when he took me to Knott’s Berry Farm on a rainy day and we rode Ghost Rider five or six times. I recall him dropping me off at my mom’s place and then him meeting my mom’s boyfriend, who was coming over more and more frequently. Even at the oblivious age of 11, I thought it was an awkward meeting. A few months later–when I wasn’t there, I suppose, since I didn’t remember it at all–he moved in. My mom was pregnant. In February of 2002, my sister was born. My mom and her third husband were married the month before in a courthouse ceremony that I didn’t attend.
I started middle school just like every other girl, full of self loathing. I was lucky enough to keep most of the friends I had in elementary school, and I made a good amount of new friends. Seventh grade was the year I met who was to become my best friend, Adri, along with a solid group of people I had only minor dramas with. This was also the year I had my first boyfriend, the first in a long line of relationships that would last between a day and three months. This one lasted a month, and he mooned over me for another three. I had moved on to moon over someone else.
The following year was just as good, with my same and expanding group of friends in all of my classes. We had suddenly gotten a group of guys attatched to the group–rather welcome, considering that our group was populated mostly by guys. Here then was my first truly serious crush, something that never happened between me and this boy. I instead ended up dating his friend, who was my first long[ish]-term boyfriend. We started high school together, but it didn’t last, and he ended up dating a friend of mine–no longer a friend after they got together as I wasn’t quite over him yet–for the entirity of high school. I, instead, dated numerous and various people over the same period of time.
When I was 16, I found out that my father had passed, and we moved to the house that was now mine. I had to change high schools right after my junior year started, and I had a hard time making friends until the almost end of the school year.  I had already been dealing with emotional issues since I was 13, but my 16th and 17th years were by far my most difficult. I gave up on school, forgoing my AP and honors classes because I was lazy and didn’t care about anything anymore. I was very focused on image that year, and I was not only dieting but dressing like a whore. I know that now, but at the time I thought I was just taking advantage of what I had–even at the time, I didn’t think it was very good, but I was working with it. My skin was really bad, my fashion sense even worse, and worst of all, I didn’t have a clue about it.
The summer between my junior and senior year was promising in many ways. I became very close with a slightly older guy, James, who I had strong feelings for, but ultimately we remained just friends. Later, I rekindled a romance with an old boyfriend, and I spent a lot of time with Adri and my best friend from my new school, Ali.
I went to my first jazz festival that summer and saw a musician–a young guy–who I was attracted to. After ending it with the old flame months later, the musician somehow found me online–we met at a San Diego jazz fest and I fell for him hard. He was kind and handsome, and I throught there was a future, in spite of it being a severely long distance relationship. He would express doubts in his feelings for me about once a month, and I repeatedly told him that until we saw each other again, we should just hold on as a little bit closer as friends. He broke up with me in March of my senior year, 2008. At first I was desperate to win him back–going so far as to cave and get a Facebook page to remain close with him– but I finally gave up and gave in to my anger.
I thought I was happy during the time that we were together, but in retrospect, I know that I was really unhappy. He was quick to anger, extremely jealous, and would often be excessively defensive if I brought up the more than friendly comments that would appear on his Myspace from other girls around the country. If it weren’t for James talking me through my misery every night, and for everyone else who was supportive in saying that I was better off without this Benny Goodman wannabe, I don’t know where I would have been emotionally at the end of my senior year.
In late April of 2008, while on a Facebook app known as Social Me, I met a guy who lived rather locally to me and only a couple of years older. We started talking, more and more, until we finally decided that we were a couple and that we were in love. Meeting him (Michael, my Michael) confirmed this, and I knew it was love–real, true, deep, undeniable love–when we first kissed. My parents found out I met him in person a week and a half before I was to graduate, and they were furious. It was understandable, I had decided to meet a stranger I had only know from the internet (and the phone, haha) which could potentially be unsafe. However, this guy was who he said he was, and my family finally gave in to that fact and allowed me to date him.
Bewteen graduation and the present, nothing has really changed. I started college a semester late as an art student, and I’ve developed a lot of hobbies that killed time when I wasn’t at school, my Michael’s house (and right now, we’ve been together almost 14 months), or hanging out with friends. Those hobbies include cooking–baking mostly, cupcakes are my favorite–jewelry making, and sewing. I no longer look at things in stores and think “Wow, I want to buy that!” but instead think “Hey, I bet I could make that myself!”

This was a lot longer than I anticipated. If you’ve read through all of this, I commend you. I don’t forsee any of the rest of these posts being as long as this one, thankfully, and they should be about things that aren’t quite as personal and…long. No, not this long. This is longer than the longest essay that I’ve ever written, haha.